All synastry aspects can operate on a platonic level or a romantic level depending on the context of the synastry. Even aspects that typically indicate attraction (like Venus/Mars) my not operate on a romantic level unless they synastry has been ‘activated’ to do so.Here’s part of what I previously posted on this topic in a thread called ‘THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN PLATONIC AND ROMANTIC SYNASTRY’. Here’s the link. http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum24/HTML/221321.html
My theory is that all aspects are always felt.
BUT they can be either felt in either a platonic way, or a romantic/mating way. No matter what the planetary combo is.
In this thread I’m going to address the varied factors in synastry that I’ve seen ‘switch on’ physical attraction aspects.
There is actually a platonic version of Venus/Mars, Venus/Uranus, Pluto/Mars and so on... After all it’s entirely possible that we could have this aspect with a friend or family member. You have Venus/Mars with grandma? No problem, maybe she just likes to give you dating advice.
The Vertex Axis, and the 5th,7th, and 8th houses, describe our 'type'. When they are switched on due to house ruler synastry, or house overlays in synastry, our romantic 'feelers' are switched on.
I have come to believe over time that the above is what determines whether a synastry is expressed platonically or romantically.
Having the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses, plus the Vertex Axis, activated in synastry ‘switches on’ traditional physical attraction synastry from it's platonic version to its romantic version.
When a person’s natal chart strongly resembles the symbolism of the 5th,7th, or 8th houses on multiple levels, this also switches on physical attraction synastry. Someone’s chart strongly matching the symbolism of our ‘Love Houses’ awakens us in a romantic way as well.
My formula is basically this…
Physical attraction synastry + 5th, 7th, and 8th house activation in syanstry/Vertex synastry = strong romantic attractions.
Now when I say the 5th, 7th, and 8th house activation, what I mean is that one person will activate all these houses in your chart on multiple different levels… Using house overlays (planets in houses), house ruler synastry, or symbolism matches
For example, a love interest may match the symbolism of your 7th house… As in you have Uranus in the 7th house and they’re an Aquarius… And they could have their Moon residing in your 5th house… And they could have their Venus conjunct your 8th house ruler… MULTIPLE DIFFERENT LEVELS.
The strongest attractions we have with others usually involve all three of the relationship houses being activated in some fashion or another. And this seems to flip a switch in our psyches between platonic associate to potential mate.
For the Vertex Axis, well it’s not essential for an attraction to occur, a relationship can manage fine without Vertex synastry…
However, what Vertex synastry does give in a romantic context is a feeling the relationship is ‘fated’ and meaningful, and that this person gives us something that we’ve been craving deep down. There’s a kooky synchronicity in relationships with Vertex synastry, where we may be shocked by what we have in common with a person who aspects our vertex. People who aspect our vertex tend to stand out in our minds, and captivate us.
When mixed with a reasonable amount of 5th, 7th, 8th house type synastry, a conjunction to either end of the Vertex Axis can really set an attraction off, in an almost ‘over the top’ way.
I’d say that synastry involving the Vertex does switch on physical attraction synastry just like the 5th,7th, and 8th houses do. Only the Vertex Axis does seem to need extra factors backing it up, as well, to make it a strong attraction… And by ‘extra factors’ I mean at least a little 5th, 7th, and 8th house synastry.
****************************************************************************************************************
Here’s another part of a different thread I posted on the same topic, called ‘SYNASTRY OF ATTRACTION: WHY IT DOES OR DOESN’T WORK’. Here’s the link. http://www.linda-goodman.com/ubb/Forum24/HTML/216505.html
SYNASTRY OF ATTRACTION: WHY IT DOES OR DOESN’T WORK
Okay. So we've probably all had that experience of meeting somebody with whom we share strong physical attraction synastry, and yet for some puzzling reason we're just not into them like that. And other times we’re head-over-heels. I think the answer to why this happens in the majority of cases is HOUSE RELATED SYNASTRY! Attraction is not purely just about what planets are aspecting what other planets. We can have Venus/Mars with one person and not harbor any romantic feelings for them at all… And have the very same aspect with a different person and be overwhelmingly attracted. This is because the ROLE a person will be playing in our lives is also largely determined by how they influence our natal houses in synastry.
I’ve been into astrology since I’ve been an early teen, and I’ve got a lot of observation under my belt. Of the people around me, myself, and celebrity case studies. As I’ve honed my passion for astrology I’ve started to notice certain patterns, especially with regard to the astrology of romantic attraction. One themes I’ve noticed is that HOUSE RELATED SYNASTRY 'ACTIVATES' ATTRACTION PRODUCING INTERPLANETARY ASPECTS. It’s seems that the physical attraction potential of certain astrological aspects can be either ‘activated’ or not depending on how the other person influences our natal chart through house ruler synastry, house overlays, and house symbolism matches.
But before I get into the house synastry thing, I’ll outline the aspects typically associated with physical attraction (Most of us know these already).
Astrology is REALLY flexible when it comes to physical attraction. There are many combinations of planets that indicate this...
PLANETARY COMBINATIONS INDICATING PHYSICAL ATTRACTION.
Sun/Moon, Sun/Venus, Sun/Mars, Sun/Pluto, Moon/Venus, Moon/Mars, Moon/Pluto, Venus/Asc, Venus/Venus, Venus/Mars, Venus/Uranus, Venus/Pluto, Mars/Asc, Mars/Mars, Mars/Uranus, Mars/Pluto...
Different planetary combinations seem to work better for different people depending on their natal charts, and the rest of the synastry with the partner. I've noticed most people do have their personal favorites based on their experiences. All of the above aspects do work, it's just a matter of preference.
I also want to mention Venus/Mercury. This aspect is not typically associated with physical attraction in the purest sense. But it can indicate finding each other's mannerisms attractive, flirty little interactions, and good kissing (so I've heard).
WHY HOUSE SYNASTRY IS IMPORTANT.
The 5th, 7th, and 8th houses are the power players when it comes to who we find attractive, and why we find them attractive. If we have a typical physical attraction interplanetary aspect with somebody, and we don't feel it that way, I suspect that the main reason for this is that they may not be hitting any of the 'relationship houses' (5th, 7th, and 8th) in synastry….
People can influence our relationship houses either by putting planets in that house through overlays (Especially if the overlaying planets make important aspects to your natal chart), or by aspecting the ruler of that house in your chart with their natal planets. When people touch the 5th, 7th, or 8th houses in your chart with their natal placements they bring the theme of that house to ‘life’ for you. Almost like they are turning that house ‘on’.
Another way for someone to activate your relationship houses is with a symbolism match... For instance, if you have a Scorpio Dsc, with Uranus in the 7th, and Pluto in Libra ruling the Dsc, and the other person has strong Scorpio/Pluto, Aquarius/Uranus, and/or Libra/Venus in their chart, then they match the symbolism of your 7th house with the makeup of their chart... Creating a symbolism match to your taste and preferences. Symbolism matches are what makes a person seem like they are your ‘type’ in terms of personality and style.
HOUSE SYNASTRY AND PHYSICAL ATTRACTION PLANETARY ASPECTS.
I've noticed over time that house related synastry seems to 'activate' any physical attraction aspects that exist in your synastry with somebody. Like it flicks the switch in our psyche that distinguishes between a platonic relationship and a potential lover. The stronger and more intense such 5th/7th/8th house related synastry is, the more intense and complete the attraction to that person will be.
If, for example, you have Moon trine Mars with somebody, and they also had their Sun in your 5th house, their Venus sextiling your 7th house ruler, and their Moon in you 8th house trining your 7th house ruler… This house related synastry would likely flick the Moon/Mars aspect ‘on’ in a romantic/sexual way. If such house related synastry involving the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses is missing, the Moon/Mars aspect would likely stay platonic, and you may like that person’s energy in a friendly way, but not find them particularly attractive.
The 5th, 7th, and 8th houses (The relationship houses) in synastry seem to be the keys to ‘activating’ the romantic attraction potential of any synastry that you have with somebody.
ACTIVATING ALL THREE OF THE HOUSES IS IMPORTANT.
In romantic relationships, it does work best if the person in question influences all three of the relationship houses in your chart some way or another. The three relationship houses (the 5th, 7th, and 8th) each represent one of the three important levels in all romantic relationships. Romance (the 5th), partnership (7th) and intimacy (8th).
If your partner’s chart connects to all three of these houses, this is a very good sign. As it indicates that the relationship feels balanced and complete for you. Having your partner connect to all three of these houses in at least some way is actually not as hard as it sounds. Your partner could aspect the ruler of one of these houses. Have planets actually in these houses. Or simply have a natal chart that matches the symbolism of one or more of these houses. For example, you have Jupiter in the 7th house, and your partner has important natal placements in Sagittarius (a symbolism match).
It’s also an extremely good sign if your partner, in turn, has all three of their relationship houses activated by you (in some why). Something as simple as a sextile to the ruler of one of the 5th, 7th, or 8th houses will be effective, especially if the other two relationship houses are strong in synastry. This way the relationship will ‘feel’ balanced and complete for your partner.
REQUITED AND UNREQUITED LOVE.
The strongest house 'relationship house' activated in the synastry for each person will determine the flavor of the relationship for them. If only one or two of these 'relationship houses' are activated for one or both of the people in the relationship, then the relationship can feel lopsided or somehow incomplete. Sometimes this even leads to an unrequited love situation, if one person has strong activation of their relationship houses in synastry, while the other person has weak or no activation of their relationship houses.
Of course if there is no relationship house activation for either person in a situation, even if they have Mars conjunct Venus, the relationship will likely stay in the platonic zone. A reverse to this is also true. If you have no typical physical attraction synastry aspects with someone, and yet they activate your relationship houses very strongly, you could see them as very much your type in terms of personality and style, and yet there seems to be a spark missing... Like there’s just not enough passion to build a connection on.
The synastry of romance seems to be a rather complicated balance between each person in the relationship having all of three of the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses activated in some way… And also having a couple of really nice typical physical attraction interaspects in the synastry. Both seem to be necessary for a relationship for worthwhile and viable to both parties.
THE THREE FLAVORS OF ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS.
I mentioned earlier about how the 'flavor' of a relationship is determined by which relationship houses are strongest for each person in the synastry. The symbolism of 5th, 7th, and 8th houses describe what we like on 3 different levels.
The 5th house is about romantic sparks, infatuation, courtship, and falling in love. It's that euphoric 'RUSH' we get when we first meet that special someone who impresses us big time! The 5th house is all about how and why we fell in love with someone in the first place (Most movies and romance novels are about this part of the relationship).
The 7th house is about what we view as 'partnership material' for the long term. And about who we really like and just want to be with in the most basic of ways. That feeling of tender sweet affection that we have for a loved one... That longing to embrace their whole vibe as a person, interact with them, and know them. This comes from the 7th house (The happy couples in typical American sitcoms exemplify 7th house love).
The 8th house is about the private bond that a couple builds up as they learn to trust each other. The 8th house is where we get intimate, reveal our mutual vulnerabilities, share secrets, and negotiate the power balance in the relationship. It's where we combine forces and unite with our partner, in the deepest, most complete ways possible... Sexually, emotionally, financially. (Media example of 8th house relationships? Psychological thrillers and X-rated stuff. Although, hopefully we get a more peaceful type of 8th house relationship than is typical of the average psychological thriller!! The 8th house has a gentle soothing side too).
THE TYPE OF RELATIONSHIP EXPERIENCE EACH PARTNER HAS IS DIFFERENT.
The relationship house that is strongest for each person in synastry will show how the relationship feels for them. For example, if you have your 5th house strongly influenced by your partner (Though 5th house overlays, aspects to your 5th house ruler, or your partner's natal matching the symbolism of your 5th house), then there’ll be a consistent theme in the relationship for you relating to the meaning of the 5th house: Feeling 'in love', being impressed, seeing the other person as adorable and special, a playful tone.
If your partner then has their 8th house strongly influenced in the synastry (Though 8th house overlays, aspects to their 8th house ruler, or your natal matching the symbolism of their 8th house), then there’ll be a consistent theme in the relationship for them relating to the meaning of the 8th house: Sexual attraction, trust, and getting emotional and physical security from the relationship, a serious tone.
Each person in a relationship will have a different experience of the relationship depending on house related synastry, and which relationship house is the strongest for them in the connection. Giving each person in the relationship their own unique experience of the flavor, feeling, or vibe of the relationship. Although, preferably all three of the 5th, 7th, and 8th houses will still be touched to some extent for each partner, even if there’s a different emphasis in the synastry.
EXCEPTIONS TO THE RULE?
Astrology is complex, so I'm sure there is more to the story... Occasionally there may be exceptions to the rule. But in the majority of cases, it's seems that what switches physical attraction producing planetary aspects from platonic to romantic, is house related synastry (And occasionally aspects to the Vertex Axis, especially conjunctions and oppositions).
House related synastry shows if a person is able to fit into the role of a romantic partner for us in very specific ways. How they are able to match our individual conceptions of courtship, partnership, and intimacy is revealed by how their chart influences these areas of life (houses) for us. If they don't influence these areas of life for us at all, they simply won't attract us much regardless of what the interplanetary synastry is.
The general trend that I've noticed is that the house person feels more the planet person, and is inspired by them. Although, I have seen a few random exceptions to this... Sometimes, for reasons unknown, the planet person will feel more for the house person. As if they personally feel it's their role to be the house person's lover/partner/intimate, and became attracted to the house person. Perhaps house related synastry goes both ways to some extent. Even if it’s usually felt more strongly on the house person's/receiving side, then on the planet person's/giving side. I think it would be interesting to explore more about what the planet person actually experiences in house related synastry, and how sensitive we really are to ‘being’ in other peoples houses, and touching their house rulers.
Another type of exception that I've noticed is that if two people have a really powerful physical attraction producing aspect... Like Sun exact conjunct Moon, or Venus exact conjunct Mars, there can be some attraction even if the 5th, 7th, and 8th house related synastry is absent. Here, it’s like the power of the aspect is so intense that it can override the 'activation switch' of the relationship houses. In these cases, you may see the person as sexy or good looking… But they won't match what your 'type' is, or fit in with your relationship ideals. As a result the connection usually goes nowhere due to lack of motivation to actually have a relationship with that person. The astrology of romantic/physical attraction is complicated stuff.
Anyway, that’s my astrological theory of why physical attraction aspects sometimes work, and sometimes don’t work, in synastry.
****************************************************************************************************************
Just to reemphasize, my formula is basically… Physical attraction synastry + 5th, 7th, and 8th house activation in syanstry/Vertex synastry = strong romantic attractions.
And it need to happen on multiple different levels in order for the attraction to be ‘complete’. I once had a yoga teacher who had Mars in my 7th house opposite my Venus in the 1st house, but that was the only strong connection he had to my relationship houses. I was not really attracted to him, but I admired his teaching style.